Ok, so the title is different to the normal expression, but I have deliberately changed it to refer to my wife, lover and best-friend, Jennifer. This is a post about her, specifically about the way in which Jen interacts with the guests at Vive Cafe, especially the women. She doesn’t know what I am writing and my words aren’t meant for any kudos with her (I know it won’t work!).
So, while I am the one who is trained in some aspects of interaction with the guests of Vive Cafe, one of the community meals that I help at each week, Jen has blown me away with the ease and way in which she connects with many of the women; the wives, mothers, daughters, and sisters etc of the folk attending (or not) who are often broken and damaged and sometimes aggressive or emotional. In fact, Jen has shown me many a time when I have failed to connect with someone, or made a judgement, and failed to accept the person.
Jen sensed how this woman was feeling and went and spoke with her, breaking through the very gruff and aggressive behaviour to the reach the pain that this woman was feeling. This women then broke down in tears as Jen held her in a hug. They remained this way for many minutes. Sometime later, after I saw Jen at our table, she told me that this woman and her son would be joining us at the table for dinner. I groaned.
It was at this point that Jen brought me to task about my judgement of this woman and her son. I sat for a moment reflecting on what she had said. Yes, I was wrong and it occurred to me that I had become too clinical after doing the Diploma last year, that I saw her and the others sometimes (most times?) as clients, even though they are referred to as guests. That is not how Jesus saw those around him, or I should see those around me. I had labelled them, placed them in a category and was reacting to them from that quadrant, and not from the heart of Jesus, love.
I have had to catch myself slipping into that mode of “client think” and remind myself to see with “kingdom eyes” — see those I am serving as loved by God, created in his image. So, I have thanked Jen for showing me the way back, but I have had to think, how many of the para-church organisations would be doing things differently when they stopped seeing people as clients and numbers but as human beings viewed as children of God?
